my goal was to make sure my sentences make sense and don’t make them to long.

Thump, thump. Sirens blared in the distance. His heart pounded, threatening to escape up his throat and choke him. Kevin glanced behind his shoulder, his hands slick with sweat. He could see flashing lights on the horizon. Red, blue, red, blue. 

There was nowhere to hide.  He could only bike endlessly across the glassy dirt road, surrounded by even more Illimitable golden fields. If he wasn’t getting chased he would have acknowledged how pretty it was, especially with the snow that was specked across the landscape. 

KA – CLTUNG! Time seemed to stop. Muddy water splashed and filled his mouth. Pain slashed across his head. He could taste it, not the mud, but something else. It was something metallic. He tried to get up, but it felt like he had just been thrown into a deep hole and buried. 

Someone had sewn his eyes shut, well, obviously, because wouldn’t he have been able to open them? Even if he couldn’t see the place he could feel the depressing vibe from it. 

“Oooww” Kevin groaned as he managed to open his eyes to tiny slits.

“ Out to work, have a great day kids.” John said happily as he was leaving.

“ Have you got your lunch and water bottle?”  Said Margaret.

“ Yes I do.” Exclaimed John 

John is a very forgetful guy and thinks that he knows everything when he doesn’t. Margaret is the opposite of John and is really proactive because…

“ Back in my day there were competitions about who can remember all their stuff and who’s more organised now it’s about six seven and brain rot.” Said Margaret very proudly  

That’s her line of random stuff thinking that the old times were better. As John walked out forgetting his work keys Margaret saw something big. 

“ Is that a giant foot from a big yeti?” Said Margaret very confusedly. 

Bob the owl who loved going for rides on top of cars. Bob lived in the middle of nowhere and in the middle of nowhere there was a camp ground and bob would sit in a tree on the side of the road to get the the camps ground and when a car drove past Bob would fly down and land on top of the car so that he could go for a ride on the roof of the car. Bob wasn’t a small owl he was a massive owl he was known as one of the biggest owls in the world. 

People would go camping at that camp ground just to see Bob and let him ride on the roof of their car. Not everyone was able to see Bob ride on the roof of the car because there were so many people that would go there that sometimes he would be busy riding on a different roof of a car. When Bob would ride on someones roof they would try to take a picture but as soon as the car stopped Bob would fly away.

Goal: Write in paragraphs.

                                                                                                 The End

The night was cold and the land was shaking. I was going down the steet when it started, I remeber like it was yesterday…

Three days earlier….

“ Hey! Are you going to the school dance Ava?” Amelia asked me “um no I’m going to… nevermind”  I said trying to sound like I wanted to but I didn’t “oh ok.. Bye I guess?” she walked away and I was standing all alone…AGAIN um what am I going to now? I thought to myself wait what is that sound? I looked around It was the rugby team, all the people in it are tough and strong and they are all boys but there is 1 girl out of the team and she is really tough her name is Iris she is one of the cool kids and she loves sports and well EVEYTHING swimmg, running, netball, you name it. everyone loves her and then you look at me a little weirdo my only friend is Amelia but Iris is friends with every one! 

A DAY LATER..

I was sitting all alone when the dumbest thing happened. Iris came over to sit with me! “Hi! My name is Iris but I think you know me!” I stared at her thinking why did she come to sit with me! Like does she want to or is she going to bully me? I don’t know what to do! “So what do you want to talk about?” Iris asked me but of course I did not say anything! Then she asked me what do I have next for class and I said I don’t know and for some reason it looked like she wasn’t listening so I was about to repeat myself but then she sarcastically said “no you don’t have to repeat yourself. I was ignoring you the first time” and then she just left! How rude and then the bell went and it was class time.

AT HOME…

“Hey kido! How was school?” my dad asked me at dinner “um it was good” I said but I was lying IT WAS TERRIBLE! “ Well me and your dad have been talking about moving to a beter place, you know?” my mum said “ WHAT! But why? I’m happy here!” I yelled at my parents “look I’m not hungry ok? I’m going to bed good night” I walked up to my room and then the ground started to shake and the house was breaking apart! What am I going to do! “ Ava! Are you ok?” my mum yelled to me “YES! I’m ok, where is dad?!” my mum nodded so

I ran to a window and saw a house floating away and saw a person screaming for help so I ran outside to help them but it turns out it was Iris screaming for help so I thought um should i help you? Like you are mean to me and well….  “Help! Help me please! I’m sorry about how mean I am to you! But please help me!” Iris’s Voice ecode all around me, it was like my only option was to help her “ok but you have to stop being mean to me ok?” I asked her “ Ok!” I pulled her up with all my strength, after I saved her we were stranded on a floating island.

 “So does this mean we are friends now?”  Iris asked me, I thought to myself are we friends?  “Ok we can be friends if you want to be” so I’m friends with the most popular girl out of school does that mean I’m cool too? I don’t know, I have bigger problems to worry about now, step one is to try to get off this ISLAND. 

“So what do we do now?” Iris asked me, I stared off into the distance I wasn’t really listening but then I said something “um I don’t know how to get off the island” then a loud sound came fron the island below “hey! What is that sound!” Iris yelled it was Amelia! She had a motorbike rocket flew off around the island “wow Amelia you’re ok!” I yelled “YEAH! I’m ok! And I’m here to rescue you, and Is that Iris?! Are you friends with her!? Cool!” she looked like she was doing a little dance in her motorbike rocket thing but then I enterupted her and said “hey! We need to go! So can we go now?!”  she looked kind of sad but then she said “ok Ava you jump on first then you Iris ok?” Me and Iris looked at each other like she was crazy but we had to do it! 

Me and Iris jumped on the motorbike rocket, soon Amelia flew us to my house “here you go!” Amelia said happily “now I need to go to my house BYE!” Soon she flew off into the sky and Iris and I were all alone at my house “um sooo… what do we do now?” Iris asked me again BOOM! The ground shook beneath us “Ahhh what was that!” I yelled, then a rocket car came out of nowhere! The person who was driving was Pippa! “HI!” she yelled, me and Iris, looked at each other like… wow! “ Hey Pippa! Did you build this?” I asked her, “yes I did build this!” she said happily, then there were some people in the back of the car it was Aisling! “She looked out the window and waved and sitting next to her was Millie! She opend the car door and came down to see us “hey Ava and Iris” said Milllie, me and Iris looked at each other again! “How are you here?!” I asked her “I just am but I need to tell you something” said Millie 

TO BE CONTINUED…

27.08.26

This is my story (I didn’t finish it)

Avery was hanging the colourful array of lights in front of her uncle and aunts stall in the tirkat market for the sunset festival, a great celebration where for a few wonderful minutes the sun and the moon sit side by side in the sky,

It was a festival of celebration, laughter would fill the streets and everyone partied for 3 days and 3 nights. Avery’s favourite thing was that all of the kingdoms must halt any disagreements with other kingdoms, whether it be political or a full blown war, it would all stop for 3 days and 3 nights, and all the kingdoms would gather in Pegasus Isle.

Avery couldn’t wait for this year’s festivities,because it was the hundredth anniversary of the making of Pegasus Isle, when the founders used magic to pull the land from the sea.

She couldn’t wait for the festivities to begin because her twin brother Noah was coming back from the war against the Padian Empire, and they always had the most fun with all their friends!

Although they were the same age, Noah had enlisted himself, lying about his age saying he was 18 when he was only 15, because last year after their parents died in the fire that destroyed their house.

Chapter 3: A Tilt In The Painting.

Inspector Morris slowly wandered into the house. Glistening light shone into the room illuminating the table that sat in the hall. Overtop sat a painting almost leaning towards the onlooker. Morris’s steps echoed the halls. The floors aggravated with even the slightest pressure. Morris started to tip toe, worried he would fall through. After what felt like an eternity Morris found his way to Mrs Mosby’s bedroom. He had asked for everything to be left alone, and it was.

Iriston was his loyal assistant, he had been with him through thick and thin. “While we’re talking about the murder, did you notice the wonky painting in the hall,” Iriston said as he lit his cigar. “Actially I did, and I bet ya something fishy’s goin’ on behind it.” So both men walked back into the hall and found the painting. Iriston carefully picked up the frame and placed it on the floor. Mr Morris’s eyes widened as he reached inside the hole. The wall had been hollowed out! It wasn’t very deep. Mr Morris pulled out half a dozen door knobs. Mr Morris placed the knobs in a jar and handed them to Iriston. Only then did he notice that he hadn’t seen any knobs on Mrs Mosby’s dresser. The plot thickened as he found multiple letters, parcels, and paperclippings inside the dresser draws. Mr Morris knew who to question first!

Chapter 4: What she said.

Detective Morris was sharp. He knew a thing or two about the minds of murderers. He knew they were very good liars, so to find the culprit he had to find the liar! He had interrogated the Paper boy. Mr Dodgers told his story just the same as he had. The maid, covered in flour and blood. Even down to the details of his paperrun, the speedy corner and near death escape, the pond with young Miss Lee, the cookies and stories at the Shearls. 

Morris had no trouble crossing Mr Dodgers off his list. Next was Miss Churchill, the maid. “Why was it that you were covered in flour, Miss Churchill?” Morris asked.

 “Well I was lifting a big bag of flour into the kitchen, I couldn’t really see where I was going detective, and I ran into the sharp edge of the counter, I’m always hitting that on my way back from the pantry. Anyway, I hit the edge and the bag burst! I reached to find the hole and then dropped it. It exploded everywhere, but then I heard a scream, and then I heard silence. I ran upstairs and by the time I reached the bedroom there she was, dead on her dresser, an open window, and a frosty chill biting at my bare arms.” Miss Churchill shivered at the thought, it was true, this was a traumatising memory for Miss Churchill to have. 

“Thank you Miss, I have just one more question, What did you say to Mr Dodgers when he arrived?” Miss Churchill thought for a moment, took a deep breath and began to speak. 

“I said, ‘They killed her, they killed her Dodgers, she was putting on her nice jewellery and then I found her dead on her dresser!’, well at least that’s what I think I said.” 

‘Damn it her story checks out, I guess this will be a harder case to solve than I thought.’

Inspector Morris would have to dig deeper!

Rrr! The guitar kept making noises. It sounded different, like a new type of music. But it was just a massive guitar the size of a massive skyscraper and the width of 4 buses. 

“Here it is,” said Will. He had finally made it up to the hill after an hour of straight struggling. He tip-toed up the stairs of the balcony “well hello instrument” he said smiling. He was holding a massive pick for the even bigger guitar.

The guitar was black with white as the secondary colour. Its neck touched the clouds like Godzilla. Will’s pick was just an orange flake he made. It was cold but the guitar was hot and melted the snow around it. Water soaked Will’s shoes and his feet were already numb. He laid the pick on the guitar and let it play. Rrr! Crr!

The sound was deafening but so weird. Will sat down and stared at the pick. His eyes started to swirl. He started getting dizzy and was about to fall over.

Boom! The guitar burst and sparks melted into the snow. A massive electric burst of sound blew out. And Will was now gone.

Will was now in a room full of pipes and whirring sounds. Inside were glowing billboards and shops that looked to be raided. No one was around. There were random bricks and debris on the ground.

RRRR! A train that looked like it was just floating in the air approached Will. Inside was a skeleton with a drivers uniform on. Will sat down in the back of the train and pulled out a small guitar he strummed and shook his head before putting it back. He got up from his old seat and made his way up front. Glass crunched underneath his feet. He wanted to be quiet because he didn’t want to wake up that skeleton. He tip-toed super quietly just in case.

My goal is to hook my reader in, here’s my story.

As Sherlock and Watson were sitting in the meeting room with the fire blazing in the background and Watson going on and on about Lucinda saying her cat stole her Gucci bag. “Sherlock, are you listening to me ?” Watson says in a sceptical tone.

“Yea i’m listening” sherlock said sleepy he leaves the room shortly after he says that and finds lucinda in the hallway dead with a note on her forehead saying in cursive hand writing ‘ I the cat got that rotten old lady P.S she totally deserved it for feeding me horrible food that taste like toilet.’ “ WASTON Lucinda’s dead!” Hollered Sherlock after he said that Watson sprinted down the hall in a cartoon like fashion with many slips, trips and crashing into things.

“This new case will either be stupidly funny or just weird” quoted watson “we’ll start the case in the morning but for now what shall we do with her now” asked watson

“Stuff her in that closet we never use” replied Sherlock.

“Nah, after a few days it would sink up the entire office,” Watson replied. We decided to put her in there anyway and do a deep dive on this mysterious talking cat. We went to the house of the pretentious Lucinda. When we got there we found some pills to put people into a deep coma and make it look like death as Sherlock told Watson, his face was pure disappointment “looks like we’ll still be dealing with Lucinda’s complaints when she wakes up”sighed Watson. Then the cat snuck up behind us and knocked us out with a frying pan.

Wrapachino
Kinda sounds like frappuccino,
It’s called a Wrappuccino,
Because it’s a frappuccino wrapped in a snake,
It is a complicated drink to make,
If you drink it you may regret it,
Because it will put you in hospital with no sweat.

The War Part 3 

Goal: Write in paragraphs.

Back At The Safe Zone.

It was cold. Too cold. The room choked with despair. Jomar’s eyes glinted in the small sliver of candle light. Everyone on the team was silent. The only nose that would break the silence was Zo zo and her sad whines. 

“We failed,” Jomar finally announced. Everyone looked at their feet, everyone but Espen. Because Espen knew they could have taken him! They could’ve succeeded the talismans so “epically” and secure secret weapon that was “impossible” to beat! Jomar stood up and started to speak. Espen just couldn’t listen, his heart beating faster with ever word:

Because we failed, because we weren’t strong enough against the talisman. 

Irritated, he stood and left with Zo zo trailing behind. 

“I just can’t believe it! We COULD secure him! We could’ve done everything he said we can’t!” Zo zo whined sympathetically again as her paws crunched over the forest leaves. 

Exhausted Espen collapsed onto the ground, the smell of mildew flooded his nose. Zo zo came over and licked his face.

“How long do you think until they start burning down this forest Zo zo?”

Espen asked. He stared up at the dark inky sky sliced apart by scarlet clouds. 

“It’s like they want the talisman to win.” He covered his eyes with his arm and sighed. 

The warmth of Zo zo had made him realize just how tired Espen felt. It was so quiet in the forest, the birds had properly left when the talisman had come. He needed to get back. But he couldn’t. He just couldn’t. Not with a traitor like Jomar around. 

To contined

“Oh my god this stupid water system doesn’t work when you want it to work on test day. How does that make sense?” Said Bob.

“Hey guys, what was that big impact that made the base flood?” Max shouted

“I don’t know if it was the giant fish or the war but I think it would be the war happening outside?” Bob commented?

“Yeah but how will New Zealand know about our base? It’s underground with no radar or anything that will make us get caught.” snarled the IT guy. Everybody knew he was in a bad mood.

“We all know where everybody is right?  Officer one said really confused.

“Yeah I think so.” Said Bob.

This is the time where all of the systems fail because it’s the time of day that we’re getting attacked.

As Jim and Bob ran down the longest hall we got and got to the end of the hall they found a red light?

It was the nuclear reactor. Its power was fully down and usually its nuclear rods never died. But luckily the engineer had spare nuclear rods to power the nuclear reactor. But when  asked the engineer where he got it from it was

“ I got this from the tank that was hit by a fighter jet.” “It was epic.” Said the Engineer.

“Well, did you see any other things out there that might be helpful to us?”  Bob asked with hope in his eyes.

“Not really but I did see a b52 that had a big wing that people were copping off the wing.” The Engineer said happily.